Just so we are clear from the gate.. I NEVER. I mean EVER. Go shopping on black friday. I loath shopping. Not just dislike, loath. But. This year. It was a must. The Christmas present (to be named later because he knows I have a blog) I needed to get my 12 yr old son, was on sale. 60 dollars off! That's a lot for a single mom/gal like me.
My brother, Troy,AKA "the muscle" said he would go with me but he wouldn't be happy about it. Thank God, he did. That ginormous thing weighed over 200 lbs. I think I have a hernia. Srsly.
Our plan? Divide and conquer. An "action isle" away was the cutest vacuum for only 28 bucks. In pink, blue or green. I know! Right! Cuteness!
How the day began actually starts with the night. I, in my infinite wisdom, did not go to sleep until midnight. At 3:22 AM. Yes! AM! My brother woke me up. He gets up that early everyday to go to work at the VIT. Needless to say, I, unenthusiastically, crawled out of bed and stumbled down the stairs to the bathroom. Thinking the whole time that, maybe, the 60 dollars was so not worth the loss of sleep. But when you say you are going to do something, you should always do it. After a condensed morning routine. We headed to WalMart. Because I am too cheap to shop anywhere else. Not that there is a huge selection of department stores in Walla Walla, Washington.
At 4 am, my brother and I had staked claim to the *present not to be named*. Much like the early Americans in the great land rush. Exactly like that only way different. We were standing there conversing with 2 other men. They were telling stories about "Black Friday" sales of old. The one I remember went something like this.
Old man speaks. "A few years ago, we were lined up outside because back then WalMart was closed. I remember we had been there for two hours already when a women came to line and tried to make her way to the front. Someone shouted, "Hey! There is a line for a reason you know?" The new arrival said, "I know. But I am disabled." Then the women that shouted, still wearing her pajamas barked, I don't care WHAT you are! Get in line lady".
I didn't say it was a nice story. Just was funny in a pathetic kind of way. It's not the end of the world if you don't get what you came for. It's a gamble. I didn't expect the "competition" side of it though. As the minutes ticked past. I turned to my brother and said time to divide? He said "yep". He's a man of few words, that brother of mine. Before I went to lay claim to my vacuum. I whispered, "Roll up your sleeves and put your 'Grr' face on." You see, my brother has his arms "sleeved" with Tattoos.
We were texting back and fourth until about 4:45 AM PEOPLE. Then the flood gates opened and people poured into the isles. He wrote me a final text. And I Quote..."Get the vacuum. I got the *present not to be named* and the shop vac. I'll meet you up front. You got the plan. No more texting. It's Showtime!" I *heart* him.
At 5AM. The black shrink wrap was devoured us consumers and chaos ensued. I did help the lady I had be talking to find a green vacuum. I started to head to where I left my brother when I got a text. Come on! it read. He was already up front. I asked if he helped the old man get one of the *presents not to be named* and he said, "Are you crazy!? He one pulled down when I did. He was trying to get two." I asked, "Well how many people were there?" His answer. "More then there was *presents*." We got to the cash register. No waiting. In and out. Woo-to-the-hoo! We were VICTORIOUS!
After we hid everything from the kids I went inside and curled up with my iTouch searching through the movie channels. Found Footloose on. Hence the chosen video above. After watching and having 80's fashion flashbacks. I packed for my trip right after work to see my Dad in Spokane. (about 3 hours from here)I got in the shower. Stayed too long, again. And arrived at my desk at 9